A few weeks ago, I shared with all of you 10 jokes that can make you laugh (or angry) in approximately one minute. And since quite a few of you responded “pretty well” to it, here I am with the second edition of 10 Jokes Per Minute!
1) What do you call security guards at a Samsung store? Guardians of the Galaxy.
2) My friend asked me if I liked her new glasses. I told her “it’s quite a spectacle!”
3) The police came to my door to tell me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. “No they aren’t,” I said. “My dogs don’t even have bikes.”
4) Why do the riot police like to get to work early? To beat the crowd.
5) How do self-absorbed people screw in a light bulb? By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them.
6) I wanted to tell you a joke about the iPhone’s headphone jack. But they told me to remove it.
7) What do you call dogs underwater? Sub woofers.
8) I don’t trust people who use graph paper. They’re always plotting something.
9) I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it. It’s true, I saw it with my own eyes.
10) Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me. It means a lot.
And thanks for reading this too. It means a lot… I think! Haha!
It’s a Friday night and I’m on a long bus ride home. What do I do? Share some jokes I found on the Internet with all of you of course! Random much? Well, wait till you hear these following jokes. 😂
1) Why do spies never use capital letters? Because they like to stay low-key.
2) 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21.
3) If I cuold time travel, I would fix my spelling.
4) I went for a job interview today and the manager said he was looking for someone who is responsible. I told them that I was the perfect choice because in my last job, whenever anything went wrong, everyone would say that I’m responsible.
5) My friend asked me to describe myself in three words. I said “lazy”.
6) What did the Indian boy say to his mother before he left for school? “Mumbai!”
7) If right now I’ll get 50 cents for every Mathematics exam I’ve failed, I’ll have $6.30!
8) I once had a goldfish that could break-dance on a carpet; but only for like 20 seconds.
9) What’s heavier, a kilogram of bricks or a kilogram of feathers? A kilogram of feathers – because now you would also have to carry the weight of what you did to those poor birds.
10) People used to laugh at me when I told them that I wanted to become a comedian. Well, nobody is laughing now.
Alright, that’s enough for tonight. Hopefully the 10 jokes above have made your minute(s) reading them a little more joyful? Haha, have a good night and I’ll see you in the next post.